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Sounds like a pig? Well, pigs are cute, if and when washed, but that’s not the point. The other day, I tried to close my eyes and concentrate one of my other senses towards all the activity in my life. My ears, that is, tried to register the gist of the sounds going on inside me and outside me. Guess what, this is exactly what I heard. Honk Honk Boink Boink. It was being repeated rhythmically across all the while that I undertook this exotic expedition.

But why honk and boink? Could I answer that? Perhaps yes. Let me try and identify all the honks and boinks in my life. Beginning from when my day begins, I’m woken up by a honk – the sound of the alarm in my sister’s cellphone. Then I boink-boink like a pig because I don’t like to be woken up like that. I start getting ready slowly, but everyone else waiting behind me to use the bathroom starts honking. I’m out quickly then and realise I’m late for school (it is a well known fact that my watch is 15 minutes too fast). So I start hurrying up and honk at my mom for making breakfast quickly. But she, despite all my despair, begins to harp about my fetish for being late and how she honours discipline and punctuality. Sounds like a boink, this one.

Nevertheless, I’m in school right before Mr Suresh can honk. Yet, he has to let the wind pass out through his vocal cords. So there goes a honk, a boink, then “Ae Saksham” and a biiig honk. And a small cute Boink with a twinkle in his eyes at the Achchhi Ladki’s like Maitreyee and ‘Surrishti’. There’s quite a cocktail of sounds, for example, Niharika’s a honk-honk-exaggerate-as-much-as-possible-honk-honk. Geetika Kaushal is boink-tum-na-bas-rehne-do-boink. Mutreja, uhmm… boink-you-don’t-know-how-to-boink-boink, Swati (God knows when she’ll boink), Jyot boink-no-one-cares-for-me-except-SD-boink, Saksham boink-aayi-re-aayi-re-khushi-boink, Rohil honk-I’ll-kill-you-if-you-do-this-question-before-me-honk! Phew!

When I get ready to go back home, Sagar honk-don’t-call-me-pinky-honk. At home, when I think of all I’ve got to study, VM ke teachers dimaag mein aate hain. Physics – boink-padh-ke-aaye-o-na-boink. Chemistry – honk-main-bada-kamina-type-ka-aadmi-hoon-honk. Maths – boink-(smile)-you-have-to-practise-(smile)-boink.

Idhar honk, udhar honk. Idhar boink, udhar boink! Sadak pe honk, Metro mein boink. TV pe honk-SabseTez-boink-Football-boink-ArjunSingh-honk-Sonia-boink-Manmohanji-(feeblest) boink.

And then when I sit down to write an article, I don’t get anything sensible and I write down about honks and boinks. What a silly thing to do! I know you’re all going to pelt me with more honks and boinks. Sorry for wasting your time.

Honk Boink. (Happy Commenting)


520 Responses to “Honk Honk Boink Boink”

  1. Anonymous Anonymous 

    It really must have been difficult to come up with such crap.
    How did you manage it?

    And just let me know why me, matrix, muttu, saksham, kaushal and 'surrishti' boink, while rohil, sagar and VM (Physics,Chem) teachers honk.

    Is it the academic profile (contradictory; somewhere) or the general body profile and the gung-ho tone.

    And I dont mean to be over rude, but the poll perhaps, is even more dumb. Especially more as it comes from the laziest perpetrator of the blog (in the form of someone not participating much in something in which he should.)

    Dont hit me with 'kirana' from your 'baniya dukan'. I am sorry if I was rude. And to think of it, I WAS.

  2. Anonymous Anonymous 

    No jinxes, no curses, coz as you can see, I am able to comment further, abhi.

    I wish that I could delete the above comment. I would now like to give in a moderate comment. But it would serve no purpose. I have already busted the balloon.

    But you know something; there wasn’t anything bizarre about the post. The problem is the standards that you yourself set for you. After BLACK & WHITE and UNDERSTANDING LIFE, one gets to read Kooh-ah-Ko-ash-Ko-ash, and then this honk-boink. It seems to be coming from some pigsty. And since I was expecting more from your 'soon to come post', I will admit here, I was disappointed.
    And its not only you, We all have started focusing too much on our own world - Ash-Ko-ash, 2 posts on Nautanki, then a post on the birthday bash of May and now this honk-boink. We've left the rest of the world to I don’t know which spotless glory, but I am missing the posts which were deep, meaningful and worldly.

  3. Anonymous Anonymous 

    No jinxes, no curses, coz as you can see, I am able to comment further, abhi.

    I wish that I could delete the above comment. I would now like to give in a moderate comment. But it would serve no purpose. I have already busted the balloon.

    But you know something; there wasn’t anything bizarre about the post. The problem is the standards that you yourself set for you. After BLACK & WHITE and UNDERSTANDING LIFE, one gets to read Kooh-ah-Ko-ash-Ko-ash, and then this honk-boink. It seems to be coming from some pigsty. And since I was expecting more from your 'soon to come post', I will admit here, I was disappointed.
    And its not only you, We all have started focusing too much on our own world - Ash-Ko-ash, 2 posts on Nautanki, then a post on the birthday bash of May and now this honk-boink. We've left the rest of the world to I don’t know which spotless glory, but I am missing the posts which were deep, meaningful and worldly.

  4. Anonymous Anonymous 

    hahahhhahahah
    Point no. 1: I've said in the post that this was a silly thing to do. So neither are your compliments rude, nor surprising since I know how pathetic the article is.
    Point no. 2: If it is such crap, how does it matter to you why some 'elite' people boink and the rest honk?
    Point no. 3: The poll, also is self-confessedly stupid (check the last option).
    Point no. 4: You totaly misunderstand the baniya. His kiryana (not kirana) is his source of income, and I'm sure he wouldn't waste it in throwing it on you.
    Point no. 5: Especially more as it comes from the laziest perpetrator of the blog (in the form of someone not participating much in something in which he should.) What the hell is meant by this? For your kind information: a) I've made all 3 banners we've had so far. b) I've made 3 polls out of the 7 or 8 so far. c) I’ve written 7-8 posts. d) I gave the blog a revamp in April. What else is expected of me? I’m not saying no one else has done as much. I’m only saying I’ve done as much as everyone else and there’s no reason to blame me for neglecting the blog.

  5. Anonymous Anonymous 

    hahahhhahahah
    Point no. 1: I've said in the post that this was a silly thing to do. So neither are your compliments rude, nor surprising since I know how pathetic the article is.
    Point no. 2: If it is such crap, how does it matter to you why some 'elite' people boink and the rest honk?
    Point no. 3: The poll, also is self-confessedly stupid (check the last option).
    Point no. 4: You totaly misunderstand the baniya. His kiryana (not kirana) is his source of income, and I'm sure he wouldn't waste it in throwing it on you.
    Point no. 5: Especially more as it comes from the laziest perpetrator of the blog (in the form of someone not participating much in something in which he should.) What the hell is meant by this? For your kind information: a) I've made all 3 banners we've had so far. b) I've made 3 polls out of the 7 or 8 so far. c) I’ve written 7-8 posts. d) I gave the blog a revamp in April. What else is expected of me? I’m not saying no one else has done as much. I’m only saying I’ve done as much as everyone else and there’s no reason to blame me for neglecting the blog.

  6. Anonymous Anonymous 

    To,
    (Whoever wrote the 3 comments)

    u got a worm in ur head. and i mean it. abhi, honestly speaking, this was such an amazing post. How did u come up with such a kool idea?? man, halfway thru the post i cudnt read furhter, laughing my lungs out.That maths teacher one was too gud,

    Dont mind foaly, he has got some psychological prob since he seems to be suffering from something we cant figure. foaly, how many days have passed since u appreciated anything in ur life. everytime, ur comments consist of of sickning bashing. u behave like those american NYT weirdos who see nothing but shit and more shit in everything they analyse. another example is OUtlooks, Namrata joshi. that stupid woman writes the reviews of movies in OUTLOOK and not in years, has she given any movie more than a 2 star. for ur satisfaction she gave a 2 star to finding neverland.

    Why have these ppl set such stupid and unattainable standards for themselves which no one can achieve. Why do we expect every article to be "shakespear"ian , every movie to be Rang de basanti, every book to be Lord of the Rings, every song to be another "Lose urself"(for me atleast). Chill it guys, we have to change our attitude. if u dont, then u r gonna spend the rest of ur life writing fucking comments as the above three.

  7. Anonymous Anonymous 

    To,
    (Whoever wrote the 3 comments)

    u got a worm in ur head. and i mean it. abhi, honestly speaking, this was such an amazing post. How did u come up with such a kool idea?? man, halfway thru the post i cudnt read furhter, laughing my lungs out.That maths teacher one was too gud,

    Dont mind foaly, he has got some psychological prob since he seems to be suffering from something we cant figure. foaly, how many days have passed since u appreciated anything in ur life. everytime, ur comments consist of of sickning bashing. u behave like those american NYT weirdos who see nothing but shit and more shit in everything they analyse. another example is OUtlooks, Namrata joshi. that stupid woman writes the reviews of movies in OUTLOOK and not in years, has she given any movie more than a 2 star. for ur satisfaction she gave a 2 star to finding neverland.

    Why have these ppl set such stupid and unattainable standards for themselves which no one can achieve. Why do we expect every article to be "shakespear"ian , every movie to be Rang de basanti, every book to be Lord of the Rings, every song to be another "Lose urself"(for me atleast). Chill it guys, we have to change our attitude. if u dont, then u r gonna spend the rest of ur life writing fucking comments as the above three.

  8. Anonymous Anonymous 

    the article was funny.A bit silly but then it ws a cute one.And well Abhinav,Jyots mom visits the blog regularly..and so does utsavs.Plz stop writting anymore of this KHUSHI stuff man.And Gods rite,Jyot is being overcritical.PLZ DELETE THE POLL OPTION AND ANY OTHER CONTENT CONTAINING......

  9. Anonymous Anonymous 

    the post ws good as rohil said.Jyot,you are being overcitical.Atleast i enjoyed reading this one.

  10. Anonymous Anonymous 

    well, firstly, abhi, congrats,
    amazing post (honk,honk,honk,honk,honk,honk)
    and to all of u amazing comments as well (boink)
    but sincerely, abhi, after the previous posts of understanding life and kooash, this is certainly a pleasant, fun and welcoming change. as for others, common guys, it feels as if it is a abhi, jyot, rohil blog. do something, write soon. i promise to do so as soon as i manage to get my things properly arranged after my room gets painted. till then honk, honk (keep blogging).

  11. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Finding Neverland ***1/2
    Director : Marc Foster
    Starring : Johnny Depp, Kate Winslet, Dustin Hoffman
    REVIEWED BY NAMRATA JOSHI




    In a scene from J.M. Barrie's play in the movie, Peter Pan sprinkles fairy dust on the disbelieving children and sends them flying to Neverland. It is a perfect analogy for the Oscar-nominated film, which requires serious suspension of belief, but once the fairy dust settles on you, it completely delights and hardly fails to wring out tears.

    Finding Neverland has Depp as writer J.M. Barrie, a boy trapped in an adult world, including a loveless marriage. He meets Sylvia Llewelyn Davies (Winslet), expressly widowed for the film, and her four boys at a time when he is under pressure to produce a blockbuster play after a recent flop. Davies and her boys bring infectious warmth to Barrie's life and he in turn suffuses their world with the magic of childhood fantasy. Depp draws them into a rich make-believe world of pirates and cowboys and teaches them to fly kites. The fantasy that Barrie tries to retrieve for the children is filled with a sense of delight, has rolling lawns and summer sun, but it is underlined by a sense of loss that hangs over the boys, particularly Peter. As Barrie gets more deeply involved with the Davies, he also withdraws further from his social-climber wife, Mary (Radha Mitchell), and from the rest of society that by now is chattering about his love for a widowed Davies and her children.
    The world of Barrie and the boys is a gorgeous fantasy but an incredulous one too. Barrie's life may not have had the creative purity as is made out. He was dogged by allegations of paedophilia. So the film is tepid and chaste in some ways and Winslet's role and her relationship with Depp is strangely underwritten. But it is Barrie's relationship with the Davies children, particularly the melancholic Peter, that makes the film. By the time he stages the now classic play, Peter Pan, based on his time with the Davies at a sick Sylvia's home, it is hard not to fall completely in love with his world. The Davies struggles go on but they find Barrie's world to retreat in to.

    Depp plays the whimsical, Scottish child-man as straight-laced but hiding a wonderful world in his mind like only he can. He is matched completely by Freddie Highmore as the quietly troubled Peter Llewelyn Davies. Both Barrie's wife Mary and Sylvia ask him to be transported to Neverland. It is such a beautifully formed world that you willingly submit to Forster's manipulation and creative licence.

  12. Anonymous Anonymous 

    this is jst to say great article abhi (honk, honk,honk) and to all of u, great comments (honk, honk, boink, boink) and i will start blogging as soon as i get my things arranged in my room after the getting the painting job done. till then keep blogging (bonk) and anmol has complained that nobody writes back to him.

  13. Anonymous Anonymous 

    This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  14. Anonymous Anonymous 

    To
    Half crazed hypocrites who believe themselves to be gods and use the word 'fuck' when they forget the meaning of pronouns.

    Being over critical only opens avenues for perfection. And there is no psycho-socio path trait in Foaly, if he aspires for perfection, leave aside he is far from it.

  15. Anonymous Anonymous 

    hoink boink boink hoink

  16. Anonymous Anonymous 

    I am waiting for mud-man turned god's reply.
    Oh please Lord, don't keep your herculean pawn waiting.

    Please give us a glimpse of your BLACK grace (with all due respect).

    Fuck Brazil, yeah, that's the spirit.

  17. Anonymous Anonymous 

    To all those who wondered ki comments post kyun nahin ho rahe hain:
    All comments are being moderated. So unless they're given a go ahead from one of the administrators, i.e. Rohil, Jyot or I, they won't be published. (I discovered this fact today.)

    To Saksham:
    The poll option doesn't necessarily point to you. And a little bit of 'khushi' adds to the happiness quotient of the article. So I'm not gonna remove anything of that sort.

    To whoever thought of posting a review of Finding Neverland:
    Are you crajy?

    abhi

  18. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Hey I loved the light hearted mood of your posts... will come back and read them agan at leisure... but i must tell you.. it made a day of packing appear brighter...
    P.S: Just curious... but how old would you be to have such a refrshingly hilarious view of things?

  19. Anonymous Anonymous 

    i hereby accept and confess that i am a complete nonsense scaling new heights of stupidity everyday every moment. I also accept that my criticism is unapologetic ,direct, liked by nobody else but myself, and i find them unusualy funny. I am determined to create new enemies (dangerous ones too) and will not cry a single tear the day one of them kicks my ass out. Here i am, in my complete senses (complete for me only), waiting for that day.

  20. Anonymous Anonymous 

    listen jyot,

    guess you haven't read my first comment or my post properly. Cos I agree with you that the post is stupid. And well below my own expectations from myself.

    The only reason people are liking it is (as far as I can understand) that we all want to get away from the seriousness of life, for whatever reason (good or bad, right or wrong). So, it's really human nature at play here and you're right in your thinking as well, cos you're human too, and yours is human nature too.

    hope that settles it

    abhi

  21. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Rohil, I never knew you could behave like this.
    To everyone here, comment no. 19 has not been posted by the true Demi God Foaly, but by a farse mud man - Rohil, who is still confused about his divine status.

    What do you want Rohil? First you put up a badly cooked up set of facts, and when I get the real review by Namrata Joshi, you refuse to acknowledge it. And then you start giving in comments in my name. Listen Mud Boy, if you really want to behave like a baby, then learn this thing, Babies don't do magic.

    And stop your lecture on how critical I must be. You know something; it isn’t my critical nature that is troubling you. The problem is, you can’t listen a word against yourself. Being expressive (critical) about things only lays ahead a scope for improvisation.

    Matrix, you like this post because you feel its light. I hate it because, for me, it is like sounds attatched to daily occurrences, making no sense at all. And if it helps your notion, “I HAVE ROOM FOR SERIOUSNESS IN MY HEAD”. I don’t know Rohil how you laughed out your lungs for this post; you must be sick in the head.

    And it is really not true that I don’t appreciate things.
    I appreciate your flair for solving questions like a rattu whiner in class, but I don’t appreciate the behavior you have been putting up.
    I appreciate Hans Zimmer, but I will never appreciate Stinky Reshammiya. Coz I have my reasons for it, and I know what I believe in.
    I appreciate Russell Crowe, but I will never appreciate Emraan Hashmi.
    I appreciate SD, regardless of the generous snide(s) people throw at me, but I cannot place your dear R-OMT there.

    One PEACE of advise – don’t fuck too much. I hope you get that.
    Please don’t be offended and don’t even get a swollen head. And grow up. And whatever you do, please don’t sleep with Manohar Vanga.

  22. Anonymous Anonymous 

    hey asshol

    i m not going to say nemore to u . our views dont match and will will never do so also.
    and btw as far as manohar vanga goes, as u must have made out spying my inbox that this guy is a friend of mine who plays an online game along wit me on the net. and btw hopw it doesnt make u jealous, but myself and he have already earned lots of money thru that game. hope u cud know the password of my paypal account. and as far as sleeping wit him is concerned, no use bashing u. only u can come up wit such abnormal(for everybody else) yet normal(for u) ideas.looking forward to the opening of school and giving u the worst defeat of ur life in basketball. 50-0 it will b, believe me

  23. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Hey Rohil, I dont care about all that you've said. But for this one line, I feel bad.
    i m not going to say nemore to u . our views dont match and will will never do so also.

    Why stay back, the almighty; Lets have it out big time and end this issue here. I feel that you are acting like a small kid who has just had a real fight with another one and is like : "Abbey jaa, Main tujhse katti hoon (katti-abba thing). Bas tu mere saamne aa, main basketball se tera sar phod doonga".

    You know, If it is all about calling people asshole and bashing them, I can do a cleaner job.

    Abhi, I still back my original view on this post. But I want to thank you for one thing. This post was anything but entertaining, but the post run has been a learning experience.

  24. Anonymous Anonymous 

    ohh yes!! lets have it out!! how??...i know dat.. u know the game" counter strike". i think u do. get that game from somewhere. and then we can sort it out one-on-one. thru multiplayer gaming. dude lets do it soon. btw tell me frankly, have u mailed ne1 4m my account?? just asking

  25. Anonymous Anonymous 

    I haven't mailed anybody from your account, though i have opened it many times over.

    one-on-one; lets have it out on a terrain i am familiar with too. Its not that I do not know about counter strike, but its been long years since i laid my hand on some good gaming.

    Suggest something in which I am supposedly at par with you.

  26. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Hi there...

    nice to hear from you and thanks a lot for having visited my blog too. Glad you weren't jittery about revealing your age:)

    I also happened to check out your blog profile... i agree with the part about respect for art and humility being the noblest virtue. I'm intrigued by your having been an international poet.... anyplace i can read your poems??

    Again, your writing is really amusing, i hope you don't lose that touch

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  156. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Cool site. Thank you:-)

  157. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Great work!

  158. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Great site! Beautiful craftsmanship!! Keep of the wonderful work!!

  159. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Good site. Thank you.

  160. Anonymous Anonymous 

    very interesting fix links

  161. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Great site! Beautiful craftsmanship!! Keep of the wonderful work!!

  162. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Nice site. Thanks!

  163. Anonymous Anonymous 

    TARRIFIC SITE!

  164. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Cool site. Thank you:-)

  165. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Excellent web site. I will visit it often.

  166. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Nice site. Thanks!

  167. Anonymous Anonymous 

    I just don't have anything to say.

  168. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Great site! Beautiful craftsmanship!! Keep of the wonderful work!!

  169. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Nice site. Thanks!

  170. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Good design!

  171. Anonymous Anonymous 

    I feel like a bunch of nothing.

  172. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Good design!

  173. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Great site! Beautiful craftsmanship!! Keep of the wonderful work!!

  174. Anonymous Anonymous 

    I just don't have anything to say.

  175. Anonymous Anonymous 

    I like your site very much indeed.

  176. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Nice site. Thanks!

  177. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Thank you!

  178. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Excellent web site. I will visit it often.

  179. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Nice site. Thanks.

  180. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Excellent web site. I will visit it often.

  181. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Hello, very nice site!

  182. Anonymous Anonymous 

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  183. Anonymous Anonymous 

    I just don't have anything to say.

  184. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Great site! Beautiful craftsmanship!! Keep of the wonderful work!!

  185. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Nice site

  186. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Good site. Thank you.

  187. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Excellent web site. I will visit it often.

  188. Anonymous Anonymous 

    I feel like a bunch of nothing.

  189. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Great work!

  190. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Well done!

  191. Anonymous Anonymous 

    very interesting fix links

  192. Anonymous Anonymous 

    very interesting fix links

  193. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Hello, very nice site!

  194. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Nice site

  195. Anonymous Anonymous 

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  196. Anonymous Anonymous 

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  197. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Excellent web site. I will visit it often.

  198. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Cool site. Thank you:-)

  199. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Good site. Thank you.

  200. Anonymous Anonymous 

    Nice site. Thanks!

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